Never Dine in Solitary
by ttoad
Summary: Grimmjow takes time to think about his past and where he's at today.


Hello, I'm back again. I still am have writers block but I really wanted to try and do another Grimmjow Fic. I find it easy to write with him as the subject because he's both a character with a lot of emotional depth as well as one of my favorite characters. This whole chapter was inspired by the phrase "Eating Meat Alone" that appeared on the chapter title page of chapter 285. I wanted to portray the more solitary side of Grimmjow's personality. The story takes place shortly after Grimmjow regains his arm, but before the start of the "Hueco Mundo" arc. Hope you enjoy.

**--0-0--**

Grimmjow sat alone on the outer wall of Las Noche overlooking the barren wasteland that was Hueco Mundo. Grimmjow had always thought it was funny how a world that appeared so peaceful and calm was filled with bloodshed and terror, as the strong crushed the weak and preyed upon their flesh merely for the right to exist. It reminded him of his life as an adjucha.

Roaming in solitude.

He remembered what it was like. He could remember every battle. That was what Hueco Mundo was.

A battlefield.

That was the truth of the world all hollows were born into. A world of never-ending battles.

That was all he knew.

There was no choice. When a menos evolves from gillian to adjucha there is an awakening. It is an awakening to the consciousness that you now exist as being known as an adjucha, but with this consciousness comes an awareness of two truths.

**YOU NOW EXIST. YOU NOW MUST FIGHT TO EXIST.**

To fight was to exist. To not fight was to not exist. That was all there was. That was all he was.

Fighting.

Existing.

What for?

As Grimmjow roamed, he fought. He fought to exist. He existed so he kept fighting.

But why did he exist. What was he fighting for?

When he first evolved he fought to exist, he never had cause to question what the purpose of his existence was. But slowly he realized that with no reason for his existence, he no longer fought to exist.

**HE EXISTED TO FIGHT.**

It sickened him. He had once fought so that he could exist, but now all he existed for was to fight. The realization of it all left a taste in his mouth nearly as vile as the flesh of those he had devoured to survive.

Then he met them.

They were like him. The wished to exist, but they had a purpose. They wished to reign over this world of endless battle. They wished to one day lord over it as kings.

As Vasto Lordes.

But they wanted more.

They wanted power. Something that would ensure they achieved their goals.

They wanted a leader. Someone to stand at the head and pull them forward to their goals.

They wanted a king. Someone that would stand above them and whose power would never fail to protect their destiny.

They wanted him.

So Grimmjow became their power. He became their leader. He became their king.

And their dream became his reason to exist.

**HE EXISTED TO BE KING.**

But now they're gone.

One night, in one night all his subjects were destroyed. But worse than the loss of those who gave him his existence was what was to come.

One night, on that one night they robbed him of his power. They robbed him of what was his crown. They robbed him of his existence.

He felt as if he'd returned to the time when he was a lowly adjucha, crawling across the endless planes of Hueco Mundo searching for a reason for his existence.

But then he found something.

He found a purpose to drive him forward.

**HE FOUND A REASON TO FIGHT!**

He would fight to take back his power. He would fight to take back his place as king. He would fight to take back his existence.

But he would fight for more than that.

He would fight so that he never lost his existence again. He'd fought as a king, so being a king became his existence. Even if he no longer had anyone to follow him, he would fight to be king.

**HE NOW EXISTED AS A KING. HE NOW HAD TO FIGHT TO EXIST AS A KING.**

**--0-0--**

I'm not happy with how I did the ending, but I'm proud of the piece as a whole. I wanted to show the part of Grimmjow that struggles with life without making it all angsty. I'm trying to do some work on two pieces involving Mayuri, but I've hit a mental road block so I'll take any character request or ideas for Mayuri if you have any. See ya soon.


End file.
